


The things you said

by flavourless_fiction



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, Fluff, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Prompt Fic, implied aromantic, implied poly, just a lot of implied stuff in chapter 6
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-03-03
Updated: 2016-02-02
Packaged: 2018-03-16 04:07:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 10,055
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3473834
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/flavourless_fiction/pseuds/flavourless_fiction
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Based upon the fic prompt that is currently going around on tumblr. A collection of minifics all requested from the prompt.<br/>Requests open either on here or on tumblr. The list is chapter 1</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Prompts

If It's crossed out it means i've already done it for Oikage but that doesn't mean I won't do it again.

  1. ~~things you said at 1 am~~
  2. things you said through your teeth
  3. things you said too quietly
  4. things you said over the phone
  5. things you didn’t say at all
  6. things you said under the stars and in the grass
  7. things you said while we were driving
  8. ~~things you said when you were crying~~
  9. things you said when i was crying
  10. things you said that made me feel like shit
  11. things you said when you were drunk
  12. ~~things you said when you thought i was asleep~~
  13. things you said at the kitchen table
  14. things you said after you kissed me
  15. ~~things you said with too many miles between us~~
  16. ~~things you said with no space between us~~
  17. things you said that i wish you hadnt
  18. ~~things you said when you were scared~~
  19. t ~~hings you said when we were the happiest we ever were~~
  20. things you said that i wasn’t meant to hear
  21. things you said when we were on top of the world
  22. ~~things you said after it was over~~
  23. things you said [make your own] (This one has been done a few times but I'm not going to cross it out)




	2. Things you said when you thought i was asleep

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was requested by Ani-kiku on tumblr, I'm not 100% sure if they have an account on here but whether they do or not it's dedicated to them.

The thing Oikawa had always hated about training camps was the bedding. It wasn’t exactly comfortable and made it difficult for him to sleep on. The first night was always the worst one as he wasn’t ever as exhausted as he would be on the other days, but on the rare occasion on the second night he’d be lying awake, forcing his eyes to stay shut as he focused on his breathing. Often getting distracted by a teammate snoring or talking in their sleep.

This however was the first occasion which he had been unable to get over the discomfort from the bedding by the third night. Noises all around him were distracting and yet he kept his eyes closed to at least make an attempt at trying to fall asleep.

The soft steps that passed by his head almost had him open his eyes but instead he rolled onto his side, facing the opposite direction to which whomever had passed him had walked. Several minutes later the person returned, the footsteps just as soft as before, as though they were scared of waking anyone up.  _Has to be a first year_. The second and third years had all dealt with the consequences of waking people up in the middle of the night and it wasn’t all that much trouble but the first years had only been on one camp with the team and the previous one had only lasted three days.

A floorboard creaked beside him, Oikawa picturing the likes of Kageyama or Kindaichi wincing in fear that their captain would be disturbed by them. He continued to feign sleeping, taking note that all movement had stopped.

It was the way he inhaled before he spoke that Oikawa knew it was Kageyama. He always breathed in unsteadily right before he spoke to Oikawa, whether it was because of nervousness or just a particular tick the first year had. Oikawa had found it cute to start off with but it quickly became annoying as he was constantly badgered him about being taught how to serve.

"Oi-oikawa-san…" He trailed off, clearly nervous. Oikawa couldn’t understand why though when the idiot would have to have assumed he was asleep. "I love you…" His voice died off again, making Oikawa’s eyes snap open. Glad that Kageyama wasn’t in front of his face, at least now the other wouldn’t know he knew. The movement resumed and Oikawa squeezed his eyes shut once more.

That wasn’t the first time he’d heard something he wasn’t supposed to of when he was faking being asleep but it was the first time he hadn’t regretted it.


	3. Things you said when we were the happiest we ever were

One year, that’s how long they’d been together. One year filled with bickering over pointless things. One year of late nights with few words said but tender touches saying enough.

One year of bliss. Kageyama didn’t need to be a genius to know that he and Oikawa were actually happy, it had taken years of the two disliking each other and a bitter rivalry to get to that point.

That was probably why he was willing to be whisked away on holidays with Oikawa and meet different family members even though it wasn’t a special occasion. It was just because Oikawa wanted to people to know about the two of them. That was the thing that made him the happiest, that Oikawa was proud about the fact that they were together.

The thought was at the back of his mind that Oikawa was displeased him simply because when the topic of his own family was brought up Kageyama would become slightly more stoic than usual. It wasn’t that he was concerned about anything other than the disapproving glare he’d receive from his father.

That wasn’t because of the fact that Oikawa was a guy, his parents had known about his sexuality for years and they knew Oikawa they’d just never been formally introduced. He hadn’t ever heard a good word about Oikawa out of his fathers mouth and that was partially influenced by his high school and middle school years.

It was something he’d considered bringing up every morning when they talked about what they were going to do for the day or anything they’d forgotten to mention the day before, before they even bothered to get out of bed. He was always happier in the morning, because at that point he had no reason to even be slightly irritated with Oikawa.

It was a thursday morning when the topic of their families got brought up again. A hot thursday morning in the middle of August that required only a thin cotton sheet to lay under, otherwise one would overheat and it would be uncomfortable for the both of them.

"I talked to your mom on Monday?" Oikawa murmured, laying on his side, fingers delicately tracing across Kageyama’s face.

"Did you say my mom?" All he got was a hum in response, confirming that he had heard him correctly. "How?"

There was a soft chuckled, around Oikawa’s eyeswrinklingto highlight how amused he was. “I answered your phone because you left it here, whilst you were at training and she had already called twice.”

"What did she want?"

Kageyama closed his eyes as he felt Oikawa’s finger tip brush against his left eyelid, the pleasant sensation preventing him from being even slightly concerned about the outcome of this conversation. “She said that you and I had to come to dinner tomorrow night and that she is excited to meet your fiancé.”

"Boyfriend." He corrected automatically, having put up with the teasing from Oikawa’s family for the last month, he was used to correcting people about it. He’d never been asked or asked himself so the term wouldn’t change until then.

"Fiancé is the right word… provided you’re okay being proposed to in bed doing the thing we do pretty much everyday."


	4. Things you said at 1am

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This mentions what happens in the last match like a lot so if you don't want to cry because of the memory of 147 probably don't read it.

The cold night felt like it was never going to end. It was only a quarter to one in the morning and Oikawa had spent the last three hours wandering aimlessly, trying to find something to do with himself. He was brooding too much to go home or stay over at Iwaizumi's house. He'd merely receive a lecture and want to escape after a few minutes.

He wasn't entirely sure why he decided that he needed to escape but he went with the emotion at the time and had stuck to his guns. The cool air while chilling embraced him and reminded him he needed to keep moving or else end up with chattering teeth and give in to the weaker part of him that did want to return home.

Oikawa just needed to focus on something else. Not volleyball, that had put him in a bad mood in the first place. They'd been training until late for months on end for nothing, only to lose to a team that while they had improved still weren't a match for his team. He'd spent six years of his life training to beat Ushijima and advance to nationals but in his final chance he didn't even get to face him. The time which he truly believed they were capable of wining. If Karasuno lost to them in straight sets then it made them look even weaker.  _He_  already looked weak because his receive was what had ultimately cost them the game but if his team looked weak then it would be his fault.

_The captain must shoulder the weight._

He'd heard the statement from his previous captain but hadn't quite understood it until the first time they lost against Shiratorizawa as a captain in high school. He'd shouldered the blame then because of a number of too obvious tosses that got blocked. This time it was because of his receiving being what was weak.

Kageyama's tosses for years had been superior to his but now his receiving was too. It stung, had it been someone else's team he wouldn't have had such an issue with it. But it was Kageyama! It just had to of been the person he'd always felt somewhat inferior to in the one thing he was one of the best at.

He leaned up against a wall in an suburban street, getting overwhelmed by his own thought process. It hadn't even been twelve hours since they'd lost. He'd kept up a calm facade around his team and when he had been at home for that brief period that he had been there. Even when he had been distracting himself he had been able to keep it together. This was the first moment he'd allowed himself to crack.

It didn't last long. He quickly used the sleeve of his sweater to dry his eyes as the front light of the house directly across the street, the shadow of whoever lived in the house coming out. He pushed himself up off the ground, with a degree of difficulty at that. Oikawa really was beginning to face the consequences of crashing into the chairs after that final toss.

The pain was mild at best but it was enough to be annoying. His main concern was getting accused of trying to break into someones house when all he was really doing was brooding about all the mistakes he'd made. If there was one thing that Oikawa Tooru was not, it was a criminal. As bad as his personality had been deemed to be by a number of reliable sources, he'd never been told his personality was thug like. Something he was proud of. "Oikawa?" The familiar voice was soft, clearly questioning whether it was him or not. Oikawa's gaze directed at the ground as he sniffed to himself didn't fully pay attention to who the voice would belong to. "What are you doing here? It's 1am."

The stiff tone was what made him click. It was the one person he'd really been thinking about.  _Think of the devil and he shall appear._  "I-I'm just trying to clear my head." He mumbled, not wanting to look at the first year setter in case he started to cry again. There was no way he'd humiliate himself twice in front of Kageyama in the space of 24 hours. "Sorry I didn't really know where I'd walked to and I guess I ended up here?" He smiled sheepishly as though he wasn't completely torn up about the game.

"Do you want to talk or at least come inside so you don't look like a homeless person."

"No, I should probably try and get home before sunrise. I have classes that I actually need to attend unlike you." He pushed himself away from the wall, brushing against Kageyama as he tried to get away from him. He didn't need to deal with Kageyama, he was tired, miserable and wanted to find something that would actually comfort him, not some brat who now knew he was better than him.

"We'll beat Shiratorizawa, we won't disrespect you."

Oikawa sighed, not wanting to respond to the statement. It was what he wanted of course, someone had to knock Ushijima down a peg and he'd be okay with it being Karasuno now that they had no chance of doing it. "Don't make any mistakes then, he'll exploit every weakness that you have, the grass that sprouts between the concrete is the easiest to rip out."

"That's rich coming from the king of barren land." Kageyama grumbled, wearing a look of sympathy.

"I know Tobio." He said, forcing a smile as a few tears began to spill, rolling down his cheeks uncontrollably. "Make me proud okay?"


	5. Things you said when you were scared

Dragging another human was never easy, especially when they actually had full mobility of their own body. They were just being stubborn rather than attempting to move quickly to get away from the thing that was making them feel uncomfortable.

Kageyama didn’t understand any of it. Why Oikawa didn’t walk faster than him to escape the theatre, clutching at his hand rather than having Kageyama drag him with a little far more effort than what was necessary. It just didn’t seem to make sense in his mind. “Hurry up.” He grumbled, squeezing Oikawa’s hand perhaps a little too harshly considering he yelped almost instantly.

"Don’t be mean Tobio-chan." Oikawa whined, his eyes darting down every alleyway they passed. Clearly terrified by the dumb horror movie that they’d watched. He was just glad there was no creepy porcelain doll store on the way home. There was no doubt in his mind that Oikawa would cry if he saw a doll.

The silence resumed for a few minutes, Kageyama mostly irritated by all of this. It had been Oikawa that chose the movie and had taunted him claiming that he would be the one that would cry and yet here was Oikawa almost trembling as they stood at the lights waiting to cross the road. “What are you even scared of? None of that is real and weren’t they in England or something?”

"I…" Kageyama couldn’t understand the rest of what was said, the older trailing off words running together.

"What?"

"I kept thinking what if it was us, how would I cope once you would be killed. Would I go crazy like the girl did?"

Kageyama frowned, it just seemed stupid to imagine yourself in that situation, even he knew it was unrealistic and yet there Oikawa was brooding over it and working himself up even more. “Wait a second! Why am I the one that dies first?”


	6. Things you said with no space between us

Oikawa had learnt to admire beauty. Specifically the rare type which only got to be seen by one individual at a time. It was one of the few things he was able to admire no matter the mood.

Perhaps that was why he indulged in such intimate activities so often. Intimacy brought out the beauty he craved to gaze upon as it often left someone at their weakest, crying, trembling and even begging due to pleasure. It was shameless and that was half the reason he enjoyed it so much.

It ultimately crossed every single boundary, each new person he was able to appreciate resulted in him being unable to go back, he couldn't regret it. In fact he was unable to regret it. The only regret he ever faced was the emotional toll he seemed to cause on other person involved. At times it caused drama, some being too immature to comprehend that he wasn't going to commit to them no matter how many times they cried, desperately trying to get him to stay.

He never did, it was a pointless request. The longest he'd ever stayed after someone begged was a weekend and in that time he'd spent most of the time sleeping or having sex, he couldn't even remember the girl's name three years on. Shows how much they meant to him.

There had been a few he kept coming back to, like the game of getting the ball on the string into the cup. It was difficult the first few times that he went for it but the more he worked on it the easier it was to fall back into his cup.

His junior high kohai had been the first he'd returned to after a few years, there had been others but Kageyama in the end was his favourite. He'd taken pleasure in breaking down the normally cold and serious setter the first time and then time and time again. The best part was that Kageyama understood how it would end and seemed perfectly okay letting it pan out the way it happened. Whether it be meeting at a party and it playing out that way, or one calling the other after having a rough day/week. It was so simple and he'd never been questioned on his own feelings helped/

The only issue was that Kageyama's bed had a certain problem. It was big enough to fit the both of them on it however it was old and made more noise than the two of them ever had. On more than one occasion the pair had ended up laughing at the bed's groan.

"Tooru..." It was soft, tired, barely audible even. If they had been at Kageyama's he wouldn't have heard him. His hand gently brushing against Oikawa's cheek, coaxing him into a heated kiss.

Unfortunately he was quickly pushed away, leaving him feeling flustered and confused as to what Kageyama wanted. The other couldn't seem to meet his eye and while his flushed cheeks were amazing, it always meant that there was something more. The first time he had been unable to meet Oikawa's eye, he later found out that he had been feeling conflicted and wasn't in the mood.

He continued to murmur his name, their bodies rocking together, parts of their skin raw from when one had squeezed the other too tightly. From experience Oikawa knew at least two on him and one on Kageyama would bruise. The two on him were probably deserved, having ignored his cry of pain until he felt a sort of pain himself, having to apologise multiple times until he was sure that Kageyama wasn't mad at him. The soft voiced disappeared again after a short period of time, Kageyama only letting out content moans as he pulled Oikawa into a kiss again. This time not pushing him away as the gentle movements slowed even more so.

That was how they always ended now days it seemed, their bodies intwined as they kissed. At least if it was the first time they were going to do it for a night. If one was going to have to leave soon after it was more heated and rushed, leaving them both spent, however, Oikawa enjoyed being gentle, it broke Kageyama down even more and made him ask for more a few hours later. That was the beauty of Kageyama, even if he never quite explained his moods that at times caused them to stop and just lie around for a bit until he felt better and if he wasn't in the mood to continue again, they generally just went out and got drunk.

Oikawa broke away after several moments, the two staring at each other for a brief period of time. He could see Kageyama looked quite happy with himself and he imagined he didn't look much different. "Are you okay?" He said, getting out of the bed quickly to remove the condom and grab a cloth from the bathroom. They'd learnt the hard way that it was easier to cleanup first and then deal with anything else later.

"Yeah, I just had a cramp in my neck and couldn't move to face you because it would hurt." Oikawa couldn't help but laugh at a comment like that, coming back into the bedroom, his eyes lighting up as he saw the tired smile that even he only got to see once in a blue moon.

Within an instant, he'd wiped any remains of their activities off of the two of them and was back in the bed, letting Kageyama's head rest on his chest. "Well at least it was something stupid and not you being worried about speaking up because of earlier."

There was a soft hum and Kageyama's hand taking one of Oikawa's, giving it a playful squeeze every now and then. "I used to be worried that you were just using me and didn't give a shit about how I felt after we were finished." He whispered, his head tilting and meeting Oikawa's eye for just a brief moment.

"Why are you telling me this now?"

"Shut up I'm not done." He grumbled, the once playful and gentle squeeze being a lot sharper this time. "I figured out not long ago that it was the opposite, most of the time when you would try and be off the radar... My radar for extended periods of time, you seemed concerned more than anything. Like you were trying to prove something I already knew from the start."

Oikawa took in a sharp breath, the one person he'd really trusted to never make any sort of confession to him was Kageyama and to date that had held up. He didn't need this, not after they'd just had sex, that was the worst time to admit any sort of feelings. "Tobio..."

"Just let me finish!" He growled, frowning at Oikawa, it was as though the content expression he'd worn not long ago had never existed. "I don't want to date and neither do you, I've seen you look disappointed when people confess to you so if I felt that way,  _which I don't,_  I wouldn't say it in the heat of the moment." He paused, releasing Oikawa's hand, and smiling at him again. "I just wanted to let you know that I'm glad that you come running to me rather than anyone else that you sleep with on a casual basis. It proves that I'm the best at two activities that we both enjoy in your eyes."

A sigh of relief escaped him, relaxing as now he didn't have to cut Kageyama off for good now. That possibly would have devastated him, even though he was only really physically attracted to him and the fact that they got along well was merely convenient he knew he'd miss having someone that had been in his life for years suddenly disappear. "Are you done?"

"Almost. I also wanted to let you know that I replaced my bed so you're not allowed to complain about coming over to my apartment anymore."


	7. Things you said after it was over

Four years, three months and a few days, that's how long they'd lasted. Although if Oikawa was being realistic, it shouldn't have been any longer than a year. By that point they were both too bitter about what they'd given up in being together.

Oikawa saw him several times in the month after the break up but they barely communicated aside from nodding to each other across a room or a passing 'hey'. In the last eight or so, he hadn't seen Kageyama once, not changing anything in his routine, he hadn't done anything to avoid the other because he didn't understand why they would need to avoid each other.

They had agreed to break up because neither one of them was happy, it was just something that was healthier for the both of them. Kageyama must have done something that had caused them to not run into each other in such a long period of time. He'd heard he was still living near by. It just seemed very out of character of his ex to change things out of his life when it wouldn't have any effect on his career, especially if said changes were inconvenient.

It wasn't upsetting seeing him or not seeing him, it just seemed strange, it made him question whether there was someone else involved, influencing Kageyama's decisions. He'd come up with that theory a few times but never was there any substance to it nor did he want to believe that the person he'd admitted he was in love with even as he called their relationship off. That was probably why the idea of it would be so painful, that Kageyama would actually change for someone.

The only place he'd been glad he hadn't run into Kageyama was at his work, it was the one sign that his fears had no substance to it. He knew if Kageyama was worried he'd gotten a girl pregnant and needed a doctors advice as to who he should see, he'd run to Oikawa first, because he'd always joked that he knew everyone good in medicine especially when it came to children. He had been trained by some of the best and that was something he'd been proud to joke about. He knew he was a damn good paediatrician but that was because of the people that had trained him and Kageyama knew it as well, so he'd come running to him the second he needed help when it came to a child.

Every morning he went to the same cafe to get a coffee on the way to his office, it was the perfect pick me up when he'd had a bad nights sleep or just because he had an addiction to caffeine. He'd liked to have admitted to having a problem but that just wasn't in his nature. Not to mention he'd never gotten 'the shakes' due to 'withdrawals'. Along with the cup of coffee occupied him on the way to work.

He could go too work early, leave late and be content with his life now. He simply enjoyed helping people especially youths that were completely unaware of their limitations. It taught him a thing or two about his youth. Them breaking up had allowed him to not feel guilty about wanting to stay at work even on his days off which were few and far between.

As he looked through his list of appointments for the morning he nibbled on his bottom lip, finding multiple new patients and a few whom he hadn't seen in awhile. That was a relief to an extent. He always worried about the mothers and on a few occasions fathers, whom would come in and plead for his help and then insist that the natural methods were the best thing for their child, week after week. He'd once told a woman that if she refused to follow what advice he was giving she would have to find a different doctor because he wasn't going to follow something that she'd read on the internet which wasn't even related to the specific aliment of the child. It had scared her into following his direction because of how good he was with her children.

He made sure each time he called someone into his office from the waiting room to approach the family if he knew who they were and if he didn't he would simply call out their name and then walk up to them. It just made it easier and the child always seemed to feel special which was what he wanted. A happy child meant a happy parent.

He exited his office, looking around the rather empty waiting room. It was always good when people showed up just on time or a little bit late, making him look better if he was also running late and today was one of those days. "Is Nakayama Youichi here?" He asked, already knowing that they'd checked in, however if they were in the bathroom then he'd just take in the family with the easiest solution to his knowledge. It was a methodology that was yet to fail him.

A small boy no older than three pushed himself off of the seat he was sitting on and running over to him, looking more than pleased that he was the first to be called over. Oikawa went down to one knee, beaming at the small boy as he sucked on his thumb. "Is that your dad coming over?" He asked, not really glancing at the adult that had followed, the child who seemed in good spirits but actually looked rather sickly was his concern.

"No, just my uncle." He said, the crack in his voice made it obvious that he was unwell and it wasn't just someone looking after their siblings kid and having no idea what to do.

"Okay well you tell him he has to come in to so he knows what you need that will make you feel better." Oikawa messed the child's hair up teasingly, standing back up and leading the way to his office. He could hear the child croak to the adult what he had just said, two pairs of footsteps following behind him. "Can you help him onto the bed that way it's easier to run a lot of the tests." He said, picking up a flat wooden stick from his desk.

He made a sideways glance at the adult, his back stiffening when he recognised Kageyama. Fate really loved to screw him over somedays. "You're not the guardian right? You're just taking care of him for your sister." He asked, motioning for him to take a seat as he stood in front of the young boy.

"Mama and dad are in Hong Kong." Youichi chirped not even giving Kageyama the chance to answer the question.

Oikawa chuckled, bopping him on the nose with the stick. "You have a lot of energy for someone that sounds really sick." He said gently feeling his glands taking note of how swollen they were.

Kageyama sighed behind him, probably uncomfortable having to come here. "He'll burn out really quickly, he only seems to be active for three hours at a time and then he'll end up falling asleep no matter where he is."

"Good to know." Oikawa muttered to himself, taking a long hard look at the child who already seemed to be on a downward spiral as his eyes fluttered as he sucked at his thumb. "I'm guessing we're at the tail end of that three hours then."

"Yeah he's been awake for about three and a half but he was pretty dozy for the first hour or so."

He nodded, proceeding to go through with his examination, asking questions when needing to, watching as the Youichi started to fall asleep right in front of him. He logged everything he had taken into his computer, frowning as he looked from the child to his results. "You're going to hate this Tobio." He chuckled.

"I'm not exactly enjoying being here, I just want to know what I can do to make my nephew feel better." He grumbled, his eyes seeming to be locked onto Oikawa.

He chuckled, recognising that immature tone from when they were in school. "I could give you a speech about how it's good you're protective and all but I think we're both not comfortable right now so I'm going to make it really simple for you. Call your sister, ask what she cooks for him when he's not feeling well, or make what your mother used to make for you when you had a cold."

"That doesn't help, I want to know how I can make him feel normal rather than these random bursts he has but then he sounds like crap, throws up at least once a day and cries at night because he says he's hurt but can't explain it." He honestly looked like he was about to murder him. Clearly not understanding what he was trying to hint at.

Oikawa turned back to his computer screen, actually wishing he could just say 'here take a script this will work wonders.' but it wasn't like that and it wasn't exactly easy to say you didn't need to come here because he's not sick. "Okay... umm... The reason why his voice is so croaky is because he's crying himself to sleep and probably wailing too, you did say it improves over the course of the day... like now is about the worst time for it?"

"Yes..."

"And you probably would remember when I went to America and got really unwell but it wasn't food poisoning my body was just reacting to the sudden change in my diet?" He felt bad for bringing up their relationship, but it was the best example he had and it would get it into Kageyama's head a little easier.

"Sort of, I don't see how that's similar though." Admittedly Oikawa would question it too if he hadn't experienced that sort of thing before, to most it would seem totally irrelevant. "Wait, weren't you unwell while you were in America anyway, but when you got home you were fine?"

He nodded, watching as Kageyama seemed to piece the puzzle together. "What did I say I was sick with in the end?" He asked, glancing over at the sleeping child for a moment, Oikawa honestly couldn't believe how quickly he'd gone from awake and seeming more active than most three year olds to being out cold.

"It's been almost a year since you practically said to me you couldn't stand to come home to me and now you're playing a guessing game with me about my nephew's health, bringing our past into it?" He spat, Oikawa feeling rather uncomfortable at the statement.

He probably was in the wrong doing this but he was just trying to explain how obvious it was to him. "I'm sorry, I'm just trying to show you what you're missing here because it's really obvious but I guess because you don't deal with kids often I should have known. Sorry I'm just trying to have it make sense to you." He couldn't even look him in the eye, realising he'd definitely crossed the line, he should have known that Kageyama would only have come here in particular because he was desperate and concerned. "I'm trying to tell you that Youichi is homesick, he has no real symptoms of any illness because they're all relatively unrelated and it is frightening having your parents go away for a period of time and it's the first time that he'd be separated from the both of them for more than a weekend. The only real concern is there might have been a big swing in his diet."

The tension seemed to shrink slightly, Kageyama looking shocked either at what he had just said or what he was saying. "I just let him eat the same stuff I eat, I mean he likes the food I give him."

Oikawa rolled his eyes, of course it was Kageyama just feeding a kid who probably had no problem eating dirt a year ago, food that wouldn't agree with him. "Don't give him anything spicy for starters, it might not be agreeing with his stomach and lower the amount of carbohydrates with an increase of vegetables and maybe a little more protein, but definitely call your sister and ask what she feeds him to make him feel better."

"That's an expensive call..."

"It'll be worth it, the pain is him feeling lonely or even just being uncomfortable in an unfamiliar environment. So if tonight or over the next few days take him home if that's actually do able just to show him his house is still fine and that it'll be the same when he does get to go home. Take a favourite toy or even a blanket with him just as a comforter." He got a nod as a response, seeming to be a bit more relaxed now that there seemed to be a clear solution that could help.

He watched Kageyama get up from his seat, picking his nephew up and putting him on his hip, the child's head resting against his shoulder. "That would help with the crying too right?"

"Well done genius." He teased, printing out a few pages of information as well as a doctors excuse for him. "Sorry, boundaries again..." He sighed, handing over the pages.

"It's fine, I should have said part of what I said to you almost a year ago." Kageyama responded, that was the closest he was going to get to an apology for that. "Now I should just thank you because you wanted me to be happier and I am, you seem to be as well."

Oikawa chuckled and nodded, glad that Kageyama had actually cracked a smile in front of him. "You know I was always scared the next time I would see you, you'd be asking for a doctor to see because you'd gotten a girl pregnant."

"No I wouldn't put you through that." He said softly adjusting Youichi on his hip as the weight started to get uncomfortable. "You know I was never against being friends, I just hated seeing you look upset whenever we ran into each other so I made a point to avoid you."

Oikawa sighed, actually relieved that Kageyama wasn't as spiteful as he really expected him to be. "Give me a call if you ever want to get drinks, I might blow you off though so invite multiple people so you don't look like a loser drinking by yourself."


	8. Things you said while you were crying.

Kageyama could list a few things that hurt him emotionally. Losing in volleyball, people he trusted completely turning against him, having animals run away from him when he has never done anything to hurt an animal in his life. More importantly it hurt watching those that he cared about hurting.

He knew he came across as apathetic and uncaring about anything but himself and his own interests but his friends and loved ones were his interests and a decent part of his life.

That was probably why watching Oikawa cry day in day out over stress was so painful. He'd seen Oikawa go through a lot but in the recent few months he'd noticed that he seemed to be becoming more and more upset over the tiniest details. There was only so much that could be said to someone that seemed to be a total wreck.

It didn't help that he couldn't seem to get what was bothering him so much, no matter how hard he tried to get even a hint as to what it was that was causing him to break on a consistent basis. The only thing he had to go off was that it was either to do with school or his work.

When Oikawa threw the door open, Kageyama couldn't help but wince as a reaction. The noise was what caused him to react, the handle hitting the wall, possibly leaving a dent. They'd get in trouble from the landlord later but defusing the time bomb that was Oikawa Tooru was far more important. "What's wrong?" He asked, taking not of how pale Oikawa was.

His book bag was put on the kitchen table before so much as a peep was made from the other. He could already see how weak he was. "I'm going to bed." Was the response, his voice wavering slightly, Oikawa making his way into their bedroom.

He'd honestly seen him look worse but perhaps that was because he was trying to hide it. Kageyama knew Oikawa didn't like him worrying about him. Although that wasn't an excuse for his inability to communicate, that was making him worry more.

Kageyama got up and followed him, Oikawa on the bed facing the wall, absolutely silent. There was no way he was actually attempting to sleep right now, he didn't even have to see his face to know he'd be crying, staring at the wall with the same intensity he used to have in a game. "Tooru..." He kept his voice low, resting a hand on his back as he sat down on the bed, rubbing circles against his back. "This needs to stop, I haven't seen you look happy in weeks."

He felt a few muscles on Oikawa's back stiffen, possibly taking offence to what he had just said. "I'm not talking about it." He whispered, curling up into a ball.

Of course he wasn't, because he never did. It made it so much harder, he wanted to help but Oikawa was outright refusing to let him in on anything. It was what kept him up at night.

The most he could really do was attempt to cheer him up through comfort, saying he was there even though he didn't know why he needed to be. Shifting so that he was laying down he pulled Oikawa against his chest. "I need to know Tooru, I'm not okay with sitting and doing nothing." The loud sob that followed hurt him more than the silence.

 _"I want to fix this on my own!"_ He shouted, flipping over, warm tears constantly flowing. "One of my professors is threatening to fail me because he thinks I plagiarised..." Oikawa paused, drying his eyes in a hurried motion. "It's all snowballing and because I can't find the source it's getting reported to the dean because the head of the department thinks I'm lying."

Kageyama frowned, understanding to an extent why he was keeping it a secret from him. Being accused of stealing someone's work wasn't something to openly admit, in high school they'd been told the risks back then, especially if it couldn't be resolved easily. "Are they questioning everything you've handed in now?" He murmured, running his hand through Oikawa's loose curls.

"I got told if I couldn't prove I wrote every word for every assignment since I'd started they would have reason enough to expel me."

"What else have you done to piss them off?" Kageyama asked, doing his best to not to bite or snap over this. One of the things he was good at was being a protective boyfriend.

He felt Oikawa shrug, noticing that he seemed to be calming down the more he was able to get out of him. "Nothing, I just don't know how I'm going to prove I wrote fourteen different papers and it's causing me to freak out... I'm sorry Tobio."

"It's fine, I just wish there actually was something I could do to help."


	9. The things you said with too many miles between us

"Turn your camera on." Was the command Oikawa gave, staring at his computer screen, waiting for the other's face to appear. It had been difficult enough for them to arrange the chance to have a video chat and now Kageyama was too much of an idiot to turn his camera on, he was possibly the world's dumbest genius.

There was incoherent grumbling on the other end. Oikawa plugging his headphones in so most of the noise outside of the apartment was cancelled out. "I'm trying, calm down I have two hours before I have to be at the courts for training."

There was silence from both ends for a moment before Kageyama's face popped up on his screen, the setter looking rather tired. If he had to be at training in two hours that meant he had sacrificed some sleep to talk to him. A twelve hour time difference was something to merely be romanticised about, it was not convenient at all because when one was free the other was probably sleeping or just going to wherever their commitments were.

Oikawa did smile at seeing his boyfriend though, clicking so that he went to full screen, trying to think of what he was supposed to say. They might have not spoken in a few weeks but they had texted the entire time. Kageyama begging that Oikawa should try and get time off work to come see him play.

He wanted to, there was no denying that but it was a little more difficult than Oikawa had anticipated. Flights and accommodation were very expensive especially because it was so last minute and it was the olympics. He should have tried to get tickets the day he found out Kageyama was definitely going but he'd put it off due to finances at the time and now he had no chance because it just cost way too much.

"We watched Russia practice yesterday, they're incredible. The idea of how we considered schools as powerhouses in junior high and high school just seems stupid. They're a real powerhouse." Kageyama started, unable to stop rambling about the teams that he'd seen and how exciting it was to play against some of the best in the world.

Oikawa couldn't hide his jealousy. It was pretty much impossible. He'd wanted to play at an international level but been unable to keep up in college and had to settle for a career which had nothing to do with sport while his boyfriend got to play in an olympic games which he was unable to even attend. It was a lesson in how to slowly become bitter about your partner's success. He hadn't gotten to that stage yet but that was partially because Kageyama never bragged, he just complained that Oikawa wasn't able to be with him.

"I miss you." He said softly, watching Kageyama's lips as he continued to ramble, the setter pausing when he heard Oikawa speak up.

There was the smallest of smiles followed by a nod, making Oikawa wish even more that he could just put his arms around Kageyama right that moment and give him a tight embrace. "I know, I miss you too. It's a shame you couldn't come but at least next time it'll be in Tokyo so then you can't have an excuse."

The other missing him was all he needed to hear. Even if the games were exciting at least Kageyama still had the opportunity to think about him and even miss him a little. It wasn't what he expected but Oikawa definitely appreciated it.


	10. The things you said the second time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A continuation of the things you said after it was over but about them getting back together

The hard surface of a chest was far more comfortable than the soft lumpy couch that Oikawa typically sat on. Especially if he was being held as he laid against him.

It certainly made reading through old medical journals seem easier, even though they were rather dry. Oikawa struggling to become interested in any of them. He loved his job and wanted to know as much as he could but these three journals were just filled with information that he’d either read before or being very dated and useless to him.

There was a gentle squeeze around his midsection, pulling him closer to the other. “Yeah?” Oikawa asked, turning his head to look at Kageyama who was looking down at him, seeming slightly amused that he had gotten Oikawa’s attention so easily.

A kiss was pressed to his forehead, causing Oikawa so shift his weight so he could turn and face Kageyama on the most part.”You promised if I came over you’d not spend all your time doing stuff for work.” He wasn’t scowling, in fact he didn’t look annoyed by it even, that was probably why it shocked Oikawa. “It’s fine, you can keep reading.”

Kageyama looked like he had expected this to happen. He could guess that he was even thinking that he should have known better, making Oikawa feel even more guilty than he should have. He hadn’t even thought about it when he’d started going through them, he just wanted to do it in case there was something he could gain from it.

There hadn’t been, he knew that but he’d ignored the boredom and continued reading. Now he had Kageyama acting passive aggressive because he wanted attention. Oikawa had to admit he was being reasonable in criticising him. “No it’s not actually.” Kageyama sighed, taking one of the journals from Oikawa’s hands and placing it away from them. “You said the only way we’d work was if we were both able to keep our work at work when we were together.”

“I know...” He mumbled, looking away from Oikawa due to embarrassment. He had spent the last year and a half since their break up not being able to separate work from home and even before they split he’d spent too much time at work or doing work at home. “I want to get back together properly but old habits die hard.”

The only reason they’d had a chance to get back together was because one night less than two months ago, Oikawa had gotten into a drunken state that left him as a blubbering mess, telling Kageyama everything that he felt. The next morning Kageyama had confronted him about it after he woke up in the younger’s bed, thankfully fully clothed considering he couldn’t remember much from the previous night. He just knew some things from messages on his phone and Kageyama’s word.

Oikawa had cried after hearing it, mostly because he was embarrassed by what he’d said and that Kageyama then followed up the tale with confessing himself. It had left the two of them in an awkward position for a week, neither knowing what to do about it. It was as though they’d accepted each other’s feelings but decided to ignore it.

He’d be lying if he said he had been surprised by Kageyama’s confession. He had hoped it was true since they’d started hanging around each other again. That was why they’d made rules, to give them a chance at working this time around. Most of them focused on Oikawa considering he’d been the real problem last time and while he had been trying, especially for the first week, it was getting harder because the more time they spent together, the less time he had to spend on work and had a risk of falling behind. It made him a little uneasy so he did try to sneak in a little bit whilst they were together.

Oikawa got up, taking the journals with him and placing them on his desk. Wearing a conflicted look as he went from them to Kageyama. They had the potential to have some gold in them but he couldn’t have a fight with Kageyama and the other walk out and possibly not talk to him for awhile. He couldn’t lose him again. This was just one of those times where he had to put work second.

He felt arms go around him, dragging him away from the desk. He hadn’t even heard Kageyama creep up behind him. “You’re pissing me off.” He whispered, pulling Oikawa into his bedroom, the pair falling on the bed. “I love you but I’m not going to be pushed as far as last time.”

“I know I love-”

“And you don’t know what’s best for me, no matter now much you think you do.”

“I know.”

“So don’t ever try what you did last time, I’ll never give you another chance no matter how I feel about you. I’m not going to be heartbroken by you all over again.”

Oikawa didn’t even open his mouth to respond that time. What was the point when Kageyama was right, he’d broken his heart as well as his own when he’d decided their breaking up was what was best for the both of them. “If I say sorry can we stop talking about that for tonight please?” He whispered, kissing Kageyama sweetly.

“We’re going to talk about it again though.” Kageyama said after Oikawa broke the kiss away, the two smiling at each other. “I love you, don’t forget that okay?”


	11. Things You Said When You Were Happy

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was requested by LesMis13 back in November, I'm so sorry it took to long!

It had been weeks since Kageyama had seen such a delighted expression on his boyfriend’s face. Well that wasn’t entirely true, he had seen Oikawa happy and close to delighted. The only issue was it didn’t entirely seem genuine.

He knew Oikawa had been stressed about the plagiarism accusations and did spend more time than usual on his computer at night, searching every single source he’d used imaginable. Kageyama had thought it was going to get resolved quickly, considering it had been an issue for quite awhile prior but it didn’t. Oikawa just seemed to be less bothered by it. Kageyama took that for a positive, because if he was less stressed and upset then it meant that the risk of expulsion was smaller than what it had been initially.

He’d come home from training that evening to be greeted at the door rather than having Oikawa sitting on the floor with his laptop on the coffee table, he wouldn’t even acknowledge that Kageyama was really there until the first year university student gave him a kiss on the cheek or hugged him from behind. He learnt quickly that it was useless to talk to his boyfriend was like that and if they went to bed at the same time then he’d get to make a small amount of conversation for a few futile minutes. He already knew that when Oikawa was focused on a project if he tried to distract him he’d get mad at him but in this instance, Oikawa just blocked him out. Blocked everything out.

The greeting was a welcomed change, Kageyama smiling at the other as he slipped off his shoes. “You won’t believe what happened today.” Oikawa said cheerfully, following Kageyama around their apartment, the younger changing into more comfortable clothes when he heard the statement.

“You finally realised you were a dumbass for the first four years of us knowing each other.” He said, a hint of snark still there, even though he was smirking at the other. He knew it wouldn’t admit to that even if it was what he realised. Not to mention if he had realised that he would have been sulking.

There was some dull laughter, Oikawa collapsing onto the bed, the two staring at each other, that is until the laughter got louder and Oikawa covered his face, his rosy cheeks still visible. “No Tobio, you idiot.” He chuckled when he seemed to calm down a little. Kageyama sat beside him, poking Oikawa’s stomach softly, making sure to not use enough pressure that would cause him to whine. “I’ll have you know, I’ve been sitting on this news all day and I wanted to tell you first, so not even Iwa-chan knows!”

“Tooru, just tell me.”

The smile faded for a moment, Kageyama realising that perhaps he should have humoured Oikawa for a little longer. He didn’t want the Oikawa he’d been dealing with for weeks to come back again, just over a misguided comment. “I talked to my professors this morning.” He said softly, turning his head to the side, one eye looking up at Kageyama.

Did he expect a response? The result had to have worked in Oikawa’s favour or been devastatingly bad, if it was anything else Oikawa probably would have told him already. “What happened?” He asked. Back when they only really had volleyball in common things were a lot simpler than they were now. When they first moved in together, the situation wouldn’t have really bothered Kageyama but now he was certainly emotionally invested, he’d realised how much Oikawa had given up to be in his courses in a very short period of time. The biggest being sacrificing his place on the first string team so he could take any internship that came his way.

“They ended their investigation, and came to the conclusion that I’d provided enough of my pieces that were all correctly sourced, with the citation being flawless too, that nothing can be proven that I didn’t write that other paper.” He wasn’t smiling, but there wasn’t a frown either. It was probably because he didn’t know how to look relieved, Oikawa’s body language however, communicated happiness. “My nutritional science professor even said that she was impressed I’d managed to gather all that information to prove that the accusation was false and hand in the two assignments she had given us. It’s not significant but next semester she may consider me to be a TA for her.”

Kageyama laughed softly, now it all made sense, he would have probably been annoyed if it was just it getting resolved and everything going back to normal. Because he would have wasted a lot of time and nothing to have actually changed. Possibly sacrificing marks in some classes too. “That’s amazing, if you do get that she’ll give you a really good recommendation too.”

“More importantly if I get it, I’ll be a TA for you and then you’ll have to listen to Tooru-sensei properly for once.” There it was the teasing that Kageyama hated and yet missed so much, he’d take it  ten times over to be able to see Oikawa never be that upset and stressed again.


	12. Things You Said I Wish You Hadn't

“Who would ever like you Tobio-chan?” Kageyama had never expected those words to come from Oikawa, someone that he’d trusted, someone he’d confided in about his own insecurities.

Oikawa knew everything and now he was saying he didn’t even consider him to be a friend. He felt stupid, used almost. Had Oikawa been using him to build up to this moment? Was he in denial and just trying to play it off and hurt him as well as himself? He was certainly smart enough to do something like that. “You really are the worst Oikawa-san.” He said, not even able to meet Oikawa’s eyes as the first year high school student stared down at him.

Their relationship had gotten off to a rocky start, because Oikawa had been so determined to beat Ushijima and didn’t want to get replaced. After the season ended that year though, Kageyama had honestly thought it got better and most of his second year at Kitagawa Daiichi they’d had a friendly relationship.

Why was he saying something like that now? Had he done something to suddenly piss him off? Kageyama had always thought he’d been respectful of Oikawa, he realised now that last year he may have over stepped his bounds slightly, but that wasn’t intentional. Was it revenge?

He couldn’t even hide that he felt like he was going to cry, Kageyama knew a lot about him was wrong socially. He was awkward, he struggled to make friends in his classes and teams, but Oikawa was someone he thought was a decent guy, and if Oikawa despised him then Iwaizumi must as well.

Oikawa was still the one that was the worst though.


	13. Things You Said Before I Slapped You In The Face

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Requested by GraceLogan

The atmosphere was tense, Kageyama staring up at his former senpai. Why was he even here? They’d barely spoke in the year since Oikawa made him feel worthless. At least he thought that was what worthlessness felt like. His team mates letting his toss hit the ground. That was true worthless feeling. He really didn’t need to hear Oikawa gloat or listen to some sort of scolding.

Anything the other could tell him, he’d told himself as he sat on the bench watching his team get defeated. Watching when he knew that he could be doing something to help. This was his chance to make it to nationals for the junior high schools and yet his team didn’t trust him and sacrificed that opportunity in the final.

“For a genius, you really are a disappointment, to think that Aoba Jousai actually offered for you to play for us is disgusting.” Oikawa barely had the chance to finish before Kageyama’s hand had made contact with Oikawa’s face, the sound echoing through the gymnasium. “Who do you-”

“Just shut up!” Kageyama shouted, stepping closer to Oikawa, only to have the other take a couple of steps back. Even Kageyama could tell that the other was startled by the reaction. “I’m never going to play for your school, because then I’d spend another year with you deliberately and I don’t think anyone would end up sane after having to deal with you for that long!”

Oikawa remained silent, the shocked expression shifting to a more annoyed one. He still chose not to speak. Kageyama didn’t know if he’d ever seen Oikawa speechless, but this was probably the most pleasant part of it all. He’d be able to join a decent school, hopefully Shiratorizawa and then he’d be able to destroy Oikawa’s final chance of getting to compete at nationals ever.


End file.
